Judas--My Brother

Tradition has it that Judas betrayed Jesus on Wednesday.  The Bible doesn't say it was Wednesday.  The Bible doesn't say it wasn't Wednesday.  Whatever.

I have fasted on Wednesdays for decades now.  Nothing extreme--just no food between midnight and noon.  When any discomfort comes on me, I remember to stop and pray.  It's been a good exercise.

Please understand--God doesn't command this.  Nor am I ingratiating myself to Him.  Any good parent understands God does not enjoy watching His children's discomfort.  I do this for me.  It is a religious exercise that reminds me how great a price was paid for me, how valuable I am to God. 

In the past several years, it has also brought me closer to humanity.

We believe Jesus died for sins, and if I had been the only one ever to have sinned, Jesus would have done it all for me.  Guess what!  If I had been the only sinner, I would have had to be the one to kill him!

And when Judas went to the Sanhedrin, he set in motion a series of events that has bought Eternal Life for me.  Brothers and Sisters, Friends and Family, Judas was my agent.  He acted on my behalf.

How can I despise him?  I wish he had repented before he died.  I can't believe Jesus would have put somebody worthless in His Inner Circle.  It seems to me that God had to find a Paul to replace Judas.  What if Judas had repented, and had gone on to be the peripatetic Apostle to the Gentiles?  What a story of grace that would have been!

No more can I despise any other sinner, even though their betrayal of Jesus is different from mine.  We are Family, Brother and Sister Sinners.  No murderer, no child abuser, no sex offender, no matter  how heinous or despicable the crime, no one is beneath me.  "For all have sinned and fallen short of the glory of God."  (Romans 3:23)  If I desire the damnation of anyone, how can I pray for my own forgiveness? 

Who is the worst sinner you can imagine?  Hitler?  Stalin?  Torquemada?  Jesus loved each one of them.  Jesus died for each one of them.  When God created each of them, just like He did for us, he was proud, and he had big BIG plans for them.  Not even a mother weeping at the news her child has been executed can know the bottomless grief God feels for all the babies he sent into the world just chock-full of gifts and graces, who used all those gifts and graces for evil.

One morning before sunrise I was driving to work and a car passed me recklessly.  I mumbled something that included the word "idiot".  Then I realized the idiotic things I had done in my rush to get out that very morning, and I realized that offensive driver was my Fellow Idiot.  We are idiots together.

Suddenly I felt solidarity with all sinners of all times and all places.  I wanted to spread my arms wide and embrace them all.

Then, in the next instant, I realized that's exactly what Jesus did when He spread His arms to be nailed to the cross.  He embraced us all, all of us sinners.

When we of the more liturgical Christian traditions receive Holy Communion, we pray a prayer of confession.  The one we use most commonly in my church says:

Merciful God, we confess that we have not loved you with our whole heart.  We have failed to be an obedient people.  We have not done your will, we have broken Your law, we have rebelled against Your love, we have not loved our neighbor, and we have not heard the cry of the needy.

A good Methodist was once heard to proclaim, "Why should I have to pray that prayer every time?  I haven't done all that!"

Maybe you haven't, my precious Sister.  But We have. Maybe I'm not guilty of all that, but We are.

We are the Church.  We are the Church together.  Sinners united, saved by Grace.  One in the Spirit.  One in the Lord.

Thanks be to God, through the unbelievable gift of Jesus Christ, who with His dying breath prayed for forgiveness for Judas, for Annas and Caiaphas, for Pilate, for the Roman soldiers who crucified him!  And for me!